Little Monsters

 

"Throw me in, Coach!
I'm ready to play, to-day!"

The little pink guy with the big fan-edged ears bounced merrily along through the garden weeds. His knobby pink flesh, veined with rich purple lines, glowed cheerfully except where covered by a tiny dark blue baseball cap, flopping chartreuse football jersey, red soccer shorts, and big neon-yellow running shoes. Over one shoulder he carried a cricket bat, that he occasionally swung playfully at a passing gnat. His flesh radiated the happy smell of fermenting plums.

Amanda would be waiting by the rabbit hutch, where they would play Rabbits Can Too Fly until they got bored and went to play Drive Kitty Squirrely. It was a beautiful summer day, Mommy was playing Bridge, and Amanda wouldn't have to go inside until *dinnertime*, which was *ages* away!

"I feel GOOD!
Yeah, Baby,
do I feel GOOD!"

But as Bibbety broke out of the weeds into the clearing by the rabbit hutch, he saw … AUNT WOMAN!

***

Bu was very old, which could be seen in his great size — he stood almost eight inches tall — his muted gray-green color, the shrunken state of his great fanned ears and the elongated spikes of his teeth. He also had the dignity of an Elder — he never used physical force to drive a lesser creature mad, but achieved his objectives by Psychological Wiles. And he had the perspective of an Elder; he knew that there was more to the Goblin Mission than having fun by playing mischief. He had glimpsed the Higher Purpose.

One of his tasks was to make sure that younger goblins survived until they got wise too.

***

Bibbety had frozen like a mouse in front of a snake as soon as he'd seen Aunt Woman standing by the rabbit hutch clutching Amanda's little hand. Fortunately, Aunt Woman was still focused on informing Amanda about Interesting Scientific Facts Concerning Rabbits, and she had not yet spotted the small highly-colored creature two feet to her right.

From the other side of the rabbit hutch, Bu projected his voice into the smaller goblin's larger ears: "Take a deep breath and run *very very fast* straight toward me."

Bibbety drew a long, long breath, expanding his chest (from the diaphragm up) three times bigger, then he scurried as fast as he could, with a long-drawn wail of "Buuuuu!", leaving a churn of dust behind him.

Aunt Woman screamed as, from her viewpoint, she saw a huge rat run out of the garden dragging a highly prized ornamental gourd.

Amanda squealed and clapped her hands, urging him on, "Bibbety!"

Bu urged him on also: "Bobbety!"

Bibbety wailed, "Bu!"

Aunt Woman hollered, "Too … ... Too … ooooo!" And fainted, bashing her head on a corner of the rabbit hutch, requiring a trip to the hospital, three stitches, two injections, sedatives and an overnight stay for nervous prostration.

***

© Anitra L. Freeman


Other Stories
Humor Directory
Site Map

Background design created by the Enchantress at Fantasyland Graphics

Tuesday, 15-Oct-2002 00:46:55 EDT